Even Billy Joel doesn't work.

Holly shit I know things are bad when Billy Joel won't even help. I'm so sick of this fucking feeling. I just want the pain to fucking end. I don't know how to make it stop. I am in a mind set I have not been in for a very very long time. And it scares me. I can't escape it. I don't like this place. It is dark and cold. I know it well I have visited it many many times. But I have always escaped. A few times not as easily as others. Some landed me in places I didn't like either. I won't let it take me there this time. I will get out. I can't crumble under the weight of the darkness again. Not now. I found myself looking in the medicine cabinet looking at the bottle of sleeping pills they gave to my wife a while back. I guess god was watching out for me. There were only fucking two left. So I guess that is his way of telling me the demons wont get me this time. I will just have to endure them till they decide to go away. -Johnny v.